International I Hate Sports Club

This topic, I realize, has been done to death, but all things aside, I just find the homosexual aspect of pro-sports to be so FUCKING HILARIOUS, I nearly shit myself.

My girlfriend recently went to the extent of cutting her hair all off, and dying what was left blue, to stop the advances of a big stupid jock at the school she's attending. (Luckily she JUST gradded.) Yes. That's right. A big retarded ape-shit jock, hitting on MY girlfriend. The sad thing is, she didn't even want to tell me, because she knew I'd kick his lilly stupid-jock ass. (Piece of re-bar (spelling?) to the knee, and by-bye any chance at a sports scholarship, you dumb piece of shit)

It offends me personally, the way big stupid jocks, with all their ambiguously gay innuendo and package-eyeing, still think they can get any woman they want in order to keep up the 'straight' charade.

Look, face it all you fat sports fans stuffing nachos down your sewers and howling at the screen like they can actually hear you, the gay undercurrent of pro sports cannot be ignored. All the 'manhandling.' The muscle-showing outfits. The friendly ass-slapping. And of course, there's the big, steamy naked shower afterwards, where big jocks can go on babbling about imaginary sexual encounters and eyeing each other's packages while they snap towels at each other and play grab-ass. Too much team spirit, I say. Far too much.

Even the fans seem a little obsessed with their 'heroes,' which I find a little disturbing, as it's been pointed out, the average sports fan is a fat, drunk, stinky ape. And, as an aside, have you ever noticed how the sports fan who screams the loudest at the set and 'defends his sport' the most obnoxiously, is also coincidentally usually the fattest, drunkest, baldest, greasiest, stupidest knuckle-dragger ever NOT to swing a bat?

I never played sports. I am, however, definitely athletic. I invented my OWN excercise, which is what I call 'extreme tree climbing.' Is it fun to watch? FUCK NO. Is it fun for me to do? You better believe it. So don't say I'm a weakling.

Because as the dumbfuck jock who keeps hitting on my girlfriend will soon discover the HARD way, being fast and smart is more important than being 'big' anyday.

CUJO THE NASTY wrote:This topic, I realize, has been done to death, but all things aside, I just find the homosexual aspect of pro-sports to be so FUCKING HILARIOUS, I nearly shit myself.


Because as the dumbfuck jock who keeps hitting on my girlfriend will soon discover the HARD way, being fast and smart is more important than being 'big' anyday.

You be right. I think at least 50% of the people really into sports are into it for the male-male bonding --I mean extreme male to male bonding. How else do you explain all the sadistic harrassment integral to high school football? Sports are an outlet for tightly wound, in-the-closet homosexuals. I keep hearing about incidents where their natural tendency bursts through the confines of the game --the most recent example was of a soccer player sticking his finger up other players' asses:

"John Hopoate a winger for the Australian National Rugby Leagueâ??s West Tigers club received a 12-week suspension for â??unsportsmanlike interferenceâ? with three North Queensland players who he â??digitally penetratedâ?. Hopoate resigned from the league rather than be suspended." In case you think that Hopoate is some gay rugby player, it turns out that he is a 27-year-old, teetotalling Mormon father of five who has been disciplined by the sportâ??s board seven times in four years, primarily for fighting.

I heard of the same thing happening a few months ago on a soccer team somewhere in Europe. Apparently it's common. I don't keep up with sports and don't know the names of the teams or players so I don't remember who it was. I just know that I'm not about to expose <b>MY</b> ass on the soccer field!

CUJO THE NASTY wrote:This topic, I realize, has been done to death, but all things aside, I just find the homosexual aspect of pro-sports to be so FUCKING HILARIOUS, I nearly shit myself.


Because as the dumbfuck jock who keeps hitting on my girlfriend will soon discover the HARD way, being fast and smart is more important than being 'big' anyday.

test test

You know, I just remembered something FUNNY from my Greek/Roman History Social Studies class...

Did you know that the ORIGINAL Olympics were played in the nude? It was believed that the athletes performed better that way. ESPECIALLY the wrestling/grappling events. That's right. No crotch-hugging sports uniforms to get in the way of all those sweaty, naked, dangling packages. Anyone who doesn't think sports are about the man-to-man contact is deluding themselves.

CUJO THE NASTY wrote:You know, I just remembered something FUNNY from my Greek/Roman History Social Studies class...

Did you know that the ORIGINAL Olympics were played in the nude? It was believed that the athletes performed better that way. ESPECIALLY the wrestling/grappling events. That's right. No crotch-hugging sports uniforms to get in the way of all those sweaty, naked, dangling packages. Anyone who doesn't think sports are about the man-to-man contact is deluding themselves.

wwwwwwwwwellll doggy! I always suspected and now I know! Sports fans are closet-cases. And I heard the same thing. And the "athletes" were patronized by rich guys who could afford them.